Why Not Romance?


The word ‘romance,’ according to the dictionary, means excitement, adventure, and something extremely real. Romance should last a lifetime. -Billy Graham

Anyone who truly knows me, shoot let me stop right there. Anyone that has spent any time conversing with me on FB or in person, knows that I am a fan of the Romance genre of books. I don’t hide it and I am absolutely in love with the idea of people falling in love and staying there. I like to see the couple end on a happy note, whether that’s with a wedding, or major commitment that in the beginning didn’t seem like it’d be a possibility and if they throw in a baby?? That is awesome(in my singsong voice)!

I know many who won’t ever read a book as I’ve described, but to each his own. I don’t particularly care for murder mysteries or any mystery now that I think of it. If there’s some suspense, thrill, action, I’m good. But reading about some super-sleuth following clues? Not my cup of tea…for the most part because I have in fact read those kinds of books and enjoyed one or two. But my point is, we all have our preferences. What I don’t particularly care for though, is the reaction to Romance by many. What is wrong with it? Why do some turn their noses up at it like it stinks and isn’t real writing?

I’m not going to get into what I was recently made aware of and that is that there are “book snobs” amongst us that will only claim to read certain books because talking about those people would be me judging them and I have no right to do that but I do want to say this: Romance is real writing and furthermore, reading it is not for the weak and foolish. Without it, without it’s subject matter, those of us that choose to escape through reading fiction, would escape to a place that will mostly be filled with drama, intrigue, murder, pain, misery, invaders from outerspace, supernatural occurrences, vampires and demons, intellectual controversy, drugs, lust, backstabbing, confusion and hopelessness-just to name a few. And I don’t know about you, but some people don’t need to visit those places for too long. I’d much rather them add some happy to their existence with romance, than thinking about everyone being out to kill them or think they can get bitten by a vampire and live to tell about it because their blood was special or something.

True, there are books that fall in other genres that might have some sort of romantic element but usually it’s not the point, it’s like a casuality of the couple in the book happening to be in the same vicinity for a long period of time. Romance is not about happenstance. The whole book, whether it delves into all those grim topics for a moment, is about the two people(mostly just two) persevering with what? Love. That’s right; I said love. And love does exist. It exists amongst extreme turmoil, pain, confusion, backstabbing, and even murder. Love perseveres. And I’m happy that so many of us, more than what so many will admit to(especially since e-readers have made it easy to keep it private)actually will escape to this happy place from time to time and dream that they can have that too, or reminisce on when they had it, or are happy that they do in fact have it now. And you know what, they share it with others either by talking about it or loaning their books, etc. I do also realize that in many books love can be found within one’s self through whatever journey is being shared in the story, so don’t jump on me here.

With that said, not all romance is for everyone. I certainly like my stories to not be too much of a fantasy. But I’m cool with a happy ending because despite what happens with so many couples since the beginning of time, there are happy endings…Defining happy may not be like it reads in the books. Usually the books ends after the couple has overcome something and then they decide they want to overcome everything together. Isn’t that love though. Isn’t that the power of love? To overcome all obstacles, big and small? In my mind, I don’t see the happy ending of these books guaranteeing that nothing else will come in this couple’s way. That they themselves won’t get in each other’s way, but I’d like to think that they will have what they need to make it through. And that is real, not fluff. I know it, because I choose to live it and I pray that if there’s someone writing me and my husband’s story after the wedding, it would still be a story of romance. A story about Love.

What are your thoughts about Romance?


22 thoughts on “Why Not Romance?

  1. I love this post. I like a lot of things, but I am always for the happy ending. Non-readers of romance assume all romance novels are about a Fabio cover, cheesy lines and hot sex.

    I think that is why I struggled emotionally with The Love Sessions while writing it. It’s a romance, but it deals with a lot of issues couples face. I had three couples that had the “happily ever after” in their shorts, but I knew at some point after “the end” they would be tested. I didn’t want drama, I wanted the kind of love story older generations smile about when they KNOW they married the one because of the tests they survived. It hurt to put my characters through it, but that’s what love is. Love is patient. Love is kind… you know the rest. And yes, love is real.

    And that is why I love romance.

  2. Reina says:

    I too love romance Aja. There is NOTHING more satisfying or beautiful to me than two people finding each other in this big world, overcoming whatever obstacles that come their way, and writing their own story together. Especially, if it’s a book and I can follow the path. Loving and living a commitment is NOT for sissies, and those that do it and do it well, give inspriation to all that Happily Every After is not just for fairytales.

  3. I love what you said in this post. The misconceptions about romance are many, but those of us who read it and write it know it’s so much more complex than “just” romance. I like what you wrote here: “Usually the book ends after the couple has overcome something and then they decide they want to overcome everything together.” <–THIS!

    It's about finding that person you want to share the ups and downs with. It's not perfect. Happily Ever After doesn't mean you'll never have problems, but at least you'll have someone to face the future and problems with. And what's so bad about that?

    • There is nothing bad about it. Love is the best thing on earth. It is a gift and romance helps to share that gift. Thanks for visiting Delaney and sharing your thoughts!

  4. I know it’s been a few weeks since you’ve written this post, but my thoughts on romance might be a bit unconventional, so to speak.

    When I wrote one of my romance novels, I opted for something a bit less “sticky-sweet” because the way I figured it, romance isn’t always sweet. There’s thorns in the roses, and chocolates do melt, and sometimes even the diamonds aren’t always of the highest quality.

    The thing I think most people enjoy about romances most of all is the connection between the two (or more *wink*) people involved. As long as you can feel what happens between the characters and care about what happens, romance can never be a bad thing.

    Unless it’s sticky-sweet all the way through… then I have a problem LOL..

    • I’m in agreement with you. Sticky-sweet all the way through is not my type of story. That can get tired and boring. I need what’s real and real doesn’t mean bad, it just means real and that includes some good and some bad. A good romance will convince me that the bad wasn’t bad enough for them to end it. I will still believe in their love in the end. Thanks for stopping by and leaving your mark, Shakir 🙂

  5. Keith Thomas Walker says:

    Well done, Aja. I totally agree with you on this one. I’m one of those people who thought romance was cheesy and lacked depth. When I decided to take writing seriously and really give it a go, I never dreamed I’d end up writing romance novels. But I read a lot of books and saw how thought-provoking many romance novels are and how informative and how intriguing. The passion and love and HEA makes them even better. I love romance!

    • Thanks for stopping by Keith and I agree completely. Romance is very thought provoking and can be intriguing and I wish more men read or wrote romance. They should read it because they need to “see” what women desire. And they should write it, because we need to “see” what they desire also. Thanks for sharing!

  6. Noel says:

    I agree, even though I’m not a straight-forward romance writer, I’ve enjoyed reading many books with love, adventure and happily-ever-afters. We all need a little romance in our lives. With so much hate going on in the world, we need an extra helping of love in our day, even if it’s the fantasy kind.

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